Archive for May, 2011

I haz a new Trophy!

Posted on May 30, 2011. Filed under: Uncategorized |

Those of you that don’t know (likely two or maybe three in the world don’t know that…. and, they were born today) I work for Microsoft. Being a Verizon customer, I was really, REALLY anxious for Verizon to get their act together and deliver a Windows Phone 7 to the Verizon faithful. (This is the one area that I have any empathy for iPhone fanatics – Verizon and Apple took their time on that one too.)

What I don’t get is what is the deal with Microsoft’s “Marketing Machine”? You’d think if you were launching a new phone to a new carrier, you’d advertise the crap out of it. The phone goes to general release in Verizon locations June 2. You remember the advertising blitz with the iPhone, right? The one that has never ended? Oh, you may have read this.

OK, enough complaining about the advertising we’re not doing. The phone itself is pretty light. It feels nice in the hand, with the power/activate button on top. Camera button for pictures and 720p video (5MP camera) is on the lower right. There are three buttons on the face – more like sensors, because there is no physical button – that are the three mandated buttons for the Windows Phone 7 operation. A back button, which takes you back to the previous page you were on, a search button (a magnifying glass – get it?) which launches search for most things – and defaults to the Bing search engine (naturally), and finally – the middle button which is a ‘Windows’ button that returns you to the main tile screen.

Windows Phone 7 is built with a new interface, known as Metro. Metro is designed around the idea that most of the main elements has a tile associated with it. Want to go to Messaging (text messages)? Tap the messaging tile. Want to make a phone call? Tap the phone (or, surprisingly – Verizon Wireless) tile. Easy, peasy. And, about those apps. Once you load apps onto the phone (no, there isn’t an Angry Birds yet… It’s coming, for crying out loud), just ‘left flick’. Want to move through messages? Move your finger on the screen up and down. I KNOW! How easy!

Oh, and if you don’t like that picture in portrait, turn the phone 90 degrees. Yeah – landscape – much better.

I know, I know. iPhone has had this for a long time. But, this is the first FUNCTIONAL Windows Phone that I’ve had. Yeah, I said the same things about Windows Mobile 6. But, this is so much cooler! Because, well, it’s new. And, it’s got some apps. And, well, it’s really nice.

Oh, and for those of you that don’t yet have the NoDo update for YOUR Windows Phone 7 – you know, the update that delivers the incredibly hard to do ‘cut and paste’ feature? Talk to your carrier. WE (Microsoft) don’t actually deliver them until they are approved and provisioned by your carrier. But, the cut and paste in the NoDo update works really well. Funny – I had the update on my phone when I got it. So, I have no idea what other things are missing when you don’t have the NoDo update.

To my colleagues at Microsoft marketing and my peers at Verizon: How about some commercials? I see an iPhone ad every 5 minutes on TV. Certainly, we could get one a night, don’t you think?

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Well, You Don’t Have an iPhone. No shit….

Posted on May 14, 2011. Filed under: Ramblings and Rants that don't fit anywhere else |

AT&T are now, seemingly, on the desperation tour for getting people to use the iPhone. You know a marketing campaign is in the desperation phase when, instead of trying to convince you that you can’t live without it because, well, you just won’t be cool anymore – they move to shaming you.

Certainly you’ve seen the latest spate of inane iPhone commercials. I guess they are done trying to convince you that it’s ‘magical’. ‘Fabulous’. ‘Incredible’. And all of those other adjectives that no one except Steve Jobs would actually use in the same sentence.

Now, the catch line for enticing you to buy an iPhone:

“If you don’t have an iPhone…. Well, you just don’t have an iPhone.”

And, so that leads to what I tend to say every time I see one of these commercials: No shit. Which, in the three hour period from 7PM to 10PM, I utter ‘No shit’ about 60 times. And, yes, the wife gets pretty irritated about it. Not that I don’t have an iPhone – she doesn’t either – but that I keep saying ‘No shit.’

There is absolutely NOTHING about the iPhone that can get me to buy one. Zero, zilch, nada. And, no – for those of you who know me personally and think I wouldn’t buy one because of who I work for – it has nothing to do with that.

Consider this: Harley Davidsons USED to be cool. Now it seems that everybody – from CEOs to janitors and lawyers (the similarities in their actual job responsibilities are striking, if you think about it), and yes – even accountants – all own a Harley. The iPhone went into the same category about 30 seconds after it was introduced. It’s just not interesting and cool if every freaking idiot and their soccer mom sister has one.

“If you don’t have an iPhone…. Well, you just don’t have an iPhone.” No shit. Oh, and Thank you, Capt. Obvious.

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